Monday, March 7, 2011

Women- The Dominate Gender

*if you’re male read the following context below with the knowledge it could invoke feelings of Gender be warned..

‎1.We can get out of most traffic infractions with our feminine wiles, charming personalities &&& if all else fails BOOBS.. .. what is this speeding ticket thing you speak of?

2.We live longer (fact)

3. Multitasking

4. We give life.. boys just give seed (like a feed store)

5. Higher pain tolerance.. case is point childbirth

6. We can forgo wearing underwear and it’s not weird, in fact some say it’s alluring.. if boys do the dangle, it’s just creepy.. and gross..

7. We can fake it.. ya good luck with that one boys..

8. If we’re considered ugly we can use makeup & new hairstyles to somewhat rectify the situation.. if a boy is ugly, he's just ugly..

9. We can reach a remote even if it is initially outside the realm of our grasp

10. We can blame that mark on our neck on a curling iron

11. We’re proven better drivers.. (go compare insurance costs before you argue with me)

12. We can wear high heels that instantly give the illusion of a butt-lift while simotaneously slimming off ten pounds

13. Wearing spanx can also give the same illusion of weight loss..

14. We watch sports & when we know what’s going on we’re laidback & chill.. if boys watch our shows (which are admittedly mediocre at best).. & they know the characters & plot it’s just straight up homo…

15. We don’t ever have to readjust &/or make sure ITS still there
16. When we have a big truck it’s not because we’re compensating for anything.. (*the clown has no penis*)

17. If we’re stupid people will usually make excuses for us. I.e we're then cute & fun & naive (& most times make if off our looks..) if a boy is dumb he's just dumb..

18. We have 7 days of legitimate & excusable orneriness.. that’s 84 days a year..(& asking us if it's 'that time' only makes you more of an ass & us less of a bitch)

19. We can end any fight (even if we’re wrong) with a few shed tears..(i'm not saying its right, i'm just saying it happens)
20. We got off the titanic first

21. We can rock guys duds.. boys can’t wear or shouldn’t wear girls clothes.. ever (*if it can fit in skinny jeans we want no part of it*)

22. Circumcision.. I needn't say more


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